the blues… the dark ominous background.
The sky is the lightest shade of grey
Thick flakes of snow falling slowly
Everything is quiet, and still
I look back inside, looking around my studio
My mind is the only thing that is moving
thinking about all of the things I want to do
and the things I want to be thinking about
Not knowing where to start
I look up again
out the window, to the outside
snow falling on willow trees and cedars
and cars and houses
reminding me to try to stop worrying
This January I made many “resolutions” to myself. Things that I was avoiding because I was fearful of what the other side would look like.
I just wanted to start living the life that I always wanted–all of the “I should do that’s” would no longer be should– but could– and– did.
Things like.. painting more, being accountable for the money I spend and worrying less about what the money means, and where I stand in my relationships, and showing appreciation and spending more time the people that matter most to me in my life
By being accountable and being appreciative of the life that I have I feel like I am starting to actually life the life that I have always wanted.
I don’t usually succumb to cliché poems,
but a co-worker showed me the following yesterday that was at his friends funeral, and it is a nice reminder to think about what the most important things in life are.
—What Will Matter–
by Michael Josephson
Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.
There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.
All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten
will pass to someone else.
Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.
It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.
Your grudges, resentments, frustrations
and jealousies will finally disappear.
So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won’t matter where you came from
or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.
It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.
So what will matter?
How will the value of your days be measured?
What will matter is not what you bought
but what you built, not what you got but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success
but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned
but what you taught.
What will matter is every act of integrity,
compassion, courage, or sacrifice
that enriched, empowered or encouraged others
to emulate your example.
What will matter is not your competence
but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew,
but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.
What will matter is not your memories
but the memories that live in those who loved you.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered,
by whom and for what.
Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident.
It’s not a matter of circumstance but of choice.
Choose to live a life that matters.
I like the mornings, waking up to a cup of coffee, walking into my studio, everything is quiet, the sound of the furnace kicks in, and I look outside at the cold air, and the exhaust coming out of the houses across the street. My toes in fuzzy wools socks, I can make anything today. I could do this all the time.